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In news from the state of North Carolina, which we may have to refer to as “North North Florida,” a man on a John Deere tractor led to a long police chase This included spike strips, shooting hoops, and finally a taser fight. We call this incident “Hicks Gone Wild” for an obvious reason: The guy on the tractor’s name was Ronnie Hicks. Oh, and that was a stolen tractor, just in case you were in any doubt.
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It sounds like old Ronnie is no stranger to the local police based on the chase synopsis released by the Boone Police Department where it all went down. The Facebook post begins by saying: “Many of you have heard or seen the videos that we were being followed by a tractor. The stolen tractor was operated by a person we are very familiar with, Mr Ronnie Hicks.” It is left to the reader to imagine why they might be familiar with this fellow, but the following account may provide some insight.
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According to the police, our GTA (Grand Theft Agriculture) adventure begins with the Deere pilot driving through the city, dodging pedestrians and crashing into things. In Boone, as in most cities, this will draw the attention of local law enforcement. Police Chief Andy Le Beau claims Hicks “hit multiple vehicles, a dumpster and a church,” adding, “We’re still trying to sort it all out.” So are we!
An OJ-style low-speed chase ensued, during which police learned that John Deere tractors are surprisingly tough, if not fast. As the speed approached 20 miles per hour, officers attempted to throw spiked strips in the path. The tractor and its irascible helmsman drove on undaunted. Next: bullets. And shooting at the tires worked, so one of the front ones ended up being peeled right off the rim. But those big wheels kept turning, tearing up the damn road in the process.
But eventually our unruly protagonist took a turn that caused him to run out of road. He jumped off the tractor with a knife. Ever heard the expression, “Don’t you bring a knife to a taser fight?” No? Well we just made it up based on what happened next. After that, Mr. Hicks was taken into custody and charged with various things – whatever the local laws cover about smashing churches with stolen tractors and whatnot.
That was the second police pursuit in Boone in this week. Until now.